I’M TOO SEXY FOR THIS BLOG

I better cross Utah off the list of places I can visit because they just outlawed the act of making sexy gestures. I modestly must say that the mere action of my smiling could be interrupted as sexy by some, so I better stay out of the state to be safe!

Previously, Utah had defined prostitution simply as a person agreeing to sex in exchange for money. (Sounds like marriage!)  The new law, according to the Associated Press, ”broadened the definition to include any person who indicates through lewd acts, such as exposing or touching themselves, that they intend (my italics) to exchange sex for money.”  Intend is a very tricky word because how can one clearly decide what constitutes intent?  Just because I look at a piece of chocolate cake does not mean I intend to eat it.

Escort services and strip clubs could find themselves in trouble because currently in Utah it is legal for private strippers to expose their genitals or touch themselves in a sexual manner. Two escort services have filed a lawsuit in federal court because the new law is practically identical to one struck down by a federal judge as being unconstitutional in 1988.  AP quoted Andrew McCullough, the attorney who represents the escort services, as saying,”the law is so broad that it could allow police to arrest licensed employees of sexually oriented businesses, such as escort services or strip club dancers, for doing their job.” He cited as an example the case of a semi-nude dancer at a strip club who could be arrested for “suggestively thrusting.”

The police say the new law will help them in undercover prostitution stings.  Previously women would ask potential Johns to expose or touch themselves to prove that they were not undercover policemen.  Now, Salt Lake City Police Chief Chris Burbank said that because making such requests are an antecedent to offering sex for money, which is illegal under the new law, police could arrest immediately at the time of the request.
That does not make sense!  Just because a woman asks a man to see his penis does not mean she wants him to pay her for sex!  She could be asking because she just wants to see his Willie.

As I was writing this blog, I received an e-mail from Victoria’s Secret offering their, “Sexiest Offer Ever!” I wonder if that would be legal in Utah?  The models on the ad looked very seductive!