SCROOGE

I have a somewhat locally famous huge walk-in closet in my bedroom that is called, “The Present Closet.”  It contains gifts running the gamut from a flat screen TV, espresso makers, a $300 bottle of champagne, jewelry and George Foreman grills to Jerry Springer t-shirts.  So it will shock most people to learn that I hate giving presents during the holiday season.

As I mathematically proved in a recent blog, holiday shopping has virtually no impact on the nation’s economy and it just a sham to trick people into shopping.  Other “holidays” are just as bad. Mother’s Day was basically invented by the greeting card industry to boost sales and I find it offensive that people think they have to have a reason to honor their Mother.  The same thing stands for Sweetheart’s Day, Secretary’s Day and all of those other bogus kind of manufactured holidays.

I am not saying that Chanukah and Christmas are fake celebrations, but they have turned into money grubbing, present opening bonanzas for greedy people.

It is not because I am selfish that I don’t like giving presents during the holiday season, I just hate that people EXPECT presents and cash bonuses.  I should be allowed to give a gift when I want to, not because it is a particular time of the year.

My theory for bestowing presents is that I want to give them when I WANT to, not because I HAVE to when the calendar page turns to December. Why do grown-up people think that just because it is the holiday season they are entitled to a gift?  Children, I understand, but adults?  Why?

So this is fair warning to everyone that they will not receive a holiday gift from me if they are more than 18 years old.  But this caveat does not include my sister because with her, we are still just kids.